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One third of these couples lived within a five-block radius of each other before they got married. Amazingly, one in every eight couples had lived in the same Today our pool of romantic options is greatly expanded.We move to new cities, spend years meeting people in college and at work, and have infinite possibilities provided by dating apps and similar technologies.It was kind of like that house De Niro had in We chatted, laughed, and soon started making out. When she was leaving, I said, "Tanya, you're a charming lady...." She said, "Aziz, you're a charming guy." The encounter seemed promising. *A nice firm ask with a little inside joke thrown in. The madness I'd descended into wouldn't have existed 20 or even 10 years ago.As everyone in the room had agreed, we were both charming people. (Tanya had been singing that Drake song at the party and knew all the lyrics.) I felt confident. There I was, maniacally checking my phone, going through this tornado of panic, all because this person hadn't written me a short message on a dumb little phone.It stunned me how women's hearts fluttered when I just posed, "What if a guy just asked you do a thing at a specific time at a specific place? A little autocorrect is one thing, but overt bad grammar and spelling are a turnoff." If you are somewhat nice, and somehow slightly humorous too? The Bad-Grammar Text One man said he was dating a spectacular woman, but things went downhill when he asked her about a mutual friend. Playing hard to get can be frustrating for all involved.But what's really changed are our underlying goals: When my coauthor, Eric Klinenberg, and I visited a nursing home and asked older folks to describe why they married their spouse, they said things like, "He seemed like a pretty good guy," or "She was a nice girl." When you ask our generation why they married someone, the quotes are much more dramatic: "She is my other half," "I can't imagine experiencing the joys of life without him," or "Every time I touch her hair, I get a huge boner." We are in an Sometimes the search is fun.


I called her but then sent a text in lieu of a voice mail.Still, the waiting had an effect: She told me she'd been really excited when I wrote back the next morning.


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